It all kicks off at kids footy game

Our nine-year-old’s school skipping team came first in a competition the other day. No hoo-hah, everyone behaved politely. End of story.

It was pretty much the same for the Easter bonnet parade our six-year-old took part in. No hoo-hahs (plenty of oohs and aahs), but again no bother.

Football however is a markedly different story. Watching our Bradley, nine, on some occasions takes me back to the days of following professional football in my youth.

For a start we, the parents, are fenced in. We have to be some four feet from the touchline, often behind a tape fence and are discouraged from encroaching or shouting. But that doesn’t stop us.

A particularly heated encounter this season saw the referee walk off the pitch and present his whistle to one parent asking: “Do you want to referee the game?”

For a split second I thought he was going to take up the offer. A few moments after that, following a player’s substitution, another irate father berated the opposition’s manager.

He grabbed his son and drove off, only to appear a couple of minutes later (minus his son) to have a slanging match with the coach … while the game continued.

I wasn’t sure which was the more entertaining – the slanging match on the sidelines or the match itself.

The most noteworthy comment, bellowed across the pitch by the fuming parent was the one: “I don’t care what you do, but you don’t do it in front of the ****ing kids.”

A good point rather spoiled by the use of the expletive … in front of the kids.

** Let me know your kids footy stories. Just write them in the comment box below.

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